Do they deliver?
Who says I told him that?
No, go for a run!
A little bird who is currently blowing raspberries on my face.
I can’t make you a coffee. I forgot how to coffee.
…someone wants to say hi.
It’s okay, it’s okay. There’s a Starbucks around the block.
Ughh, I’m not ready for this parenting thing right now. You’re an asshole for telling him to jump on me.
I so want a divorce.
Divorce me, and I’m taking half of everything; including your comments.
Make me a coffee while you’re up and tell whoever it is to leave us to wallow in self pity.
It was a knock at the door.
Go answer it then.
Imma just hide under the covers now.
Is my head just banging a lot or was that a knock at the door?
Okay, that’s gross.
If you’re feeling so great, you make the coffee.
You took me for better or worse. So coffee. Please?
You’re the worst husband ever. Fine, but if I vomit into it, you only have yourself to blame.
Rude, you married me, so you should love me that much!
Sober Sugar married you. Hungover Sugar did not.
But I asked you first.
I don’t love you enough for that. I’m going to lay in bed with the curtains closed until I stop feeling like utter crap.